Life is Fleeting
by mkh2
Summary: Kuwabara Kazuma, I am proud to say that I have known you. A look at the relationship between Kuwabara and Yukina.


Life is Fleeting

* * *

In the course of one hundred years, the soft down of naïveté shed and replaced itself with the stronger yet equally beautiful plumage of awareness. Having lived thus long after the first meeting and still continuing on that lonesome road, one begins to appreciate that which has past, a gentler, kinder view taking precedence in one's memory. 

Yukina lifted her head from where she knelt in the human graveyard. Being an ice-demon, she was predisposed to a long life. There were others who she knew she could rely on, close friends she had made a hundred years ago even if the number had dwindled somewhat since then. For that very reason she was now in the frozen cemetery, a sheet of the finest, whitest snow in a lacy layer on the ground and trees and tombstones as far as she could see. It was both breathtakingly dreary and heartbreakingly beautiful. She frowned slightly at the tombstone she was watching over.

Kuwabara Kazuma

---

She had been unaware of his feelings for a long time, thinking him a kindly, friendly soul, very funny and sweet. Years passed and she, like many others of the female variety, began to notice just what "a catch" he was. Not devastatingly good-looking, no, but a more subdued handsomeness, strong, loyal, honorable, and quite studious – something he had become quite devoted to after the many adventures of the Reikai Tantei came to a (mostly) close. He could have the pick of any girl he wanted. She had seen the admiring glances thrown his way when they would visit with each other.

She began to get jealous when he smiled at another girl.

True, there really was no reason for that. She had started to notice that his voice, though gentle and quiet when speaking with her to soothe, could become equally impassioned and heated when her very name was mentioned. There was a sparkle in his eyes that she had failed to notice before but she was unsure how to go about mentioning it – how would she explain that she had never noticed it before but now the very thought of it sent shivers of a different sort up her spine?

He would take her hands often in his and press them, not so that they would hurt, but that a gentle, soothing heat would pass through them, up her hands, and shoot to the tips of her toes and hair and overtake her heart and it would beat – _do-kun_. In one of those moments, one day, she couldn't stop herself from breathing out a throaty "Kazuma."

Relationships are hard to maintain, especially amongst ice-demons like herself.

Kazuma was willing to try, though.

Overall, their circle of friends was quite supportive, though Hiei, at first, made overtures as if though he were rather disapproving. After a "talk" with Yusuke, however, and some gentle prodding from Kurama, he (rather curtly) gave them his blessing though the both of them were quite at a loss as to why it would be so important. Later they would understand but at this moment such thoughts are fleeting…

By that point, many years had passed; Kazuma was nearing his thirties, even if only the fewest lines were showing on his distinguished face.

There was never any problem with him, he had no fault – it was all hers. She was so afraid. She didn't know how to love; even Hiei, who used to seem so cold about everything, seemed quite affectionate to his friends (well, as affectionate as Hiei can be.)

The subject of marriage came up more and more frequently as time passed.

Yusuke started popping in more often to talk with Kuwabara, each time asking them when they were going to "tie the knot." Kuwabara would go off on a rambling tangent that set her off giggling yet again. Hiei would sit on the arm of the recliner that Yusuke tended to sprawl himself in glowering darkly at the mention of marriage. Kurama would smile pleasantly but say nothing. Keiko and her husband (eventually Keiko and Yusuke had parted ways… he just couldn't leave behind his responsibilities in the Makai, after all, and it was much too much a strain on her) and their children kept coming along for encouragement, as if trying to bolster Kuwabara's confidence enough so he'd pop the question. Botan would drop by and the two girls would have tea and gossip about nothing in particular.

_"I can be the best man, naturally… And, of course, Hiei could walk Yukina down the aisle," Yusuke grinned broadly, not a sign of aging on that youthful face as he gestured with his thumb to the fire demon perched at his side on the arm._

_"Why Hiei?" Kuwabara frowned in annoyance. "Couldn't Kurama do it?"_

_Yusuke, as usual, made a face. "Hiiiieiiiii…" he whined, glaring at the smaller demon._

_Hiei raised his nose in the air and simply stated: "Feh."_

_Yusuke, if he wasn't so comfortable in that recliner (whenever Yusuke wasn't there Hiei would sit in it himself, trying his best to take up the whole space with his tiny frame), would've gotten up and started ranting at Hiei but as it were he just sunk back in and start grumbling under his breath. ("One of these … hafta tell … it isn't fair…her.") But soon he'd start up again._

_"Really, Kuwabara, all you have to do is pop the question. Then we'll have a **monster** of a wedding! Won't it be fun?" Yusuke would laugh and Hiei would frown and Kurama would smile and Kuwabara… "Yeah, you **would** make it out as a monster wedding, wouldn't you Urameshi?"_

They hadn't known that he had already asked her many times by that point.

One day, not long after Kuwabara had celebrated his thirtieth birthday (♪♫"_Fifteen years of loving you! Half my life, lived just for you!_"♫♪), Yusuke overheard yet another of his proposals to her. Yusuke had a strange look on his face – he hadn't quite expected to hear the word "again" to come up in the proposal – and Kuwabara looked faintly embarrassed. They pretended it was nothing, instead both of them jumping on the first excuse they could think of – Yusuke coming around uninvited ("I thought you were long gone to the Makai by now!" "What? When there's still leftover cake around? No way!")

The marriage proposals started coming further apart from each other. It seemed that Yusuke didn't keep quiet about overhearing that Kuwabara had proposed _several_ times before and that obviously she had declined each of them otherwise there probably would've been a bunch of red-headed ice hanyou running around by then. Even Hiei looked vaguely sympathetic. Kurama tended to sport a blank expression when there wasn't anything else to dwell on.

When Kuwabara turned forty he stopped asking.

That night on his birthday he and Yusuke, and Kurama and Hiei, crashed at Genkai's temple and drank some sake. Hiei didn't drink much but obviously it was enough for him to act out of character… for a week, which, it seemed, was how long the alcohol was still in his system. That night alone he had pulled on Kurama's hair, half screeching at him to stop the carrot that was trying to steal his sister. After that, he poked fun at Kuwabara (nothing new really, it was just funny since he actually pantomimed all of his jokes and barbs) and then he curled up on Yusuke's lap and purred like a cat as he slept, which made Kuwabara come over and pet "neko-Hiei" since he liked cats too. Yusuke complained that his legs fell asleep. Apparently, he had a rather high tolerance for alcohol.

That week Yusuke managed to get Hiei to tell Yukina the truth about her brother.

The week after that Yusuke disappeared, as well as Hiei. Kurama said that Hiei was very angry with Yusuke and left it at that. Botan, who had been visiting at the time of Hiei's confession chuckled loudly and nervously for a minute and a half. Keiko worried about Yusuke for that minute and a half before wondering aloud about Botan's mental health, which shut up the blue-haired ferrywoman of death.

Eventually the two turned up, not looking _too_ much worse for the wear, though every time Yusuke looked at Hiei the little demon would turn a furious red and grumble darkly under his breath. Yusuke said it was better that he turned red instead of green and everyone agreed with him.

There were long stretches of time when Kuwabara and she wouldn't see Yusuke, Hiei, Kurama or Botan – sometimes they'd be working on some otherworld politics or hunting down rebels and criminals to try to maintain the peace between the different worlds. When they did see each other Yusuke had started to look rather… sad. He had noticed a while back that he wasn't aging and seeing his human friends age, his mother getting old, and the passing on of a certain teacher at his old high school that he respected the most was hard for him. Even Genkai seemed to be running down, seemed to be at the same stage she had been when they had first met. He hadn't realized that, in accepting responsibility for one-third of the Makai would change his aging process though Koenma had hinted that he would've aged slower than other humans to begin with, looking at the wave-cycle of his spirit energy back when he first died. He was often banded together with Kurama who understood exactly what he was going through for, having lived as the human Suichi, he had grown attached to his human mother and human step-father and human "half-siblings" and watching them age while he didn't appear to was hard for him.

Kuwabara was getting near fifty when yet another "fight" had broken out between Yusuke and Hiei. It was rather silly, really, and the actual fight happened prior to the little brawl they had after to let off some steam.

Yusuke was staring at himself in the hall mirror, lightly touching his face, eyes, forehead, eyebrows, nose, lips, cheekbones, chin, before grabbing his cheeks and tugging on them. He repeated the process a few times, ending up with a bunch of little white half-circles on his cheeks in a mass of cherry splotches from the abuse his cheeks suffered at his own hands.

"What are you doing, Urameshi? Trying to find a new way to break a mirror?" Kuwabara asked.

"He's been rather moody lately – this is just his way of having a little temper tantrum indoors," drawled Hiei, sitting in the prized recliner.

"Am not," grumbled Yusuke, now preferring to squish his cheeks in with his hands, giving him the fish-lip look.

"You are too – just because you don't look any older doesn't mean you aren't, though in this case we might make an exception, brat."

"What are you talking about – I'm three months older than you!" snapped Yusuke, glaring at Hiei through the mirror.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about – it's your demon blood, that's all."

"If that's all, why hasn't anyone else shown signs of not aging?" groused Yusuke. "I thought my demon blood was rather diluted."

"That's because you activated it a long time ago, brat," Hiei smirked, arm reaching to the side of the recliner to find the lever to lay it flat.

"That's it! We're taking this outside!" Yusuke jumped over Kuwabara, startling him from the sandwich he was in the process of eating, grabbed hold of Hiei by the front of the shirt, and dragged him outside. When they came back in, Yusuke looked a mess while Hiei didn't look too ruffled. Yusuke set about to eating a bunch of junk food at the counter while Hiei just closed his eyes and took over the recliner again, brooding.

After that, for a good while, every time Yusuke came over he looked rather skittish, eyes tracing over and over Kuwabara's face rather sadly before trying to bring up some funny story or play video games or _something_, _anything_ to keep his mind off of Kuwabara's age. He stopped waking up Kuwabara from his naps. He didn't pick fights with him anymore, as if conceding to the fact that Kuwabara was now more fragile than he has, perhaps, ever been in his life and hoped to prolong the life as long as he could.

In fact, the rest of the team was also quite careful with Kuwabara over his "condition." Kuwabara hadn't so much as sparred since his forty-eight birthday and even then those were short, _short_ spars. Hiei didn't snap so much at him anymore but seemed to consider his old comrade with half-hidden wonder, as if the small demon had never seen an old man before – surely he had but this time he was actually watching the long slow process of death overtake a once vigorous young man. Kurama would smile in a placating manner whenever Kuwabara was riled up about something.

Nobody said it but it was felt weighing heavily over the group. Kuwabara was getting _old_.

Perhaps the most sensitive about this subject was not Kuwabara but Yusuke. Besides Keiko, Kuwabara was truly his first friend, albeit a strange one. A rival, a friend, a comrade… They've been together through thick and thin and the softer side of Yusuke (as evidenced by Puu) was taking this rather hard.

A few months before Kuwabara's fifty-sixth birthday Genkai died again, for good. They found her slouched over in front of one her beloved games, a smug half-smile on her face and the words "High Score" flashing on the screen. Yusuke (though he wouldn't admit later) sobbed the whole day, struck hard by the loss of his "Gran'ma." Kuwabara took it rather badly as well, but at least consoled himself with the fact that she had lived longer than most people (she was nicely over 100 after all) and just quietly cried at her funeral. Keiko's eldest son took to watching over her shrine because Yusuke was quite often in the Makai or at times in the Reikai, either on assignment or just visiting, and therefore couldn't take care of the shrine himself.

Things went quietly after that. More births, more funerals. All of Keiko's children, except her youngest daughter who was _very_ picky, were married with at least one child. Kurama's younger step-brother went back to college. Yusuke's mother had a steady boyfriend who was ten years younger and completely _enamored_ with her.

His fifties passed in that fashion as did the sixties and he retired. Kuwabara entered the seventies completely bored out of his mind and took a part time job counseling a bunch of "good-for-nothing brats who think they're all that just 'cause they're young and can bench press fifty. Ch'. I bench press three times that on my off days."

It was then that she started noticing just how frail he truly was. One day she reached over to pick up his hand and suddenly clearly saw how the blue veins showed through the pale skin on his thin, bony hands. She looked at the sharp profile of his face and saw how weathered he looked, the deep lines on his forehead from frowning, the deeper creases around his mouth from laughing so much. His eyes, which had always been bright with life and energy, shone more dimly than she had ever seen them. He looked…._old_….and suddenly she wanted to scream "I love you! I love you, I love you, _I love you!_ I want to be with you forever! I want to– I want to marry you and have children with you! I want to— _I want to **grow old** with you!_"

She found herself watching him even more closely than she ever had, saw the way his hands shook just slightly when he'd opened a jar, saw the way his fingers would tremble as her tied his shoelaces… saw how his lips quivered and his eyes glinted whenever he moved to kiss her. She felt all the more hungry for his touch but he often shied away, as if he wasn't certain he should, if he could touch her, if he could still satisfy her the way she deserved to. She longed to throw herself in his arms and never let go but when she reached for him could see a look of guilt cross over his still handsome, in her eyes, features.

… 

Kuwabara's ninety-first birthday went by without a hitch. They had cake and balloons spilling out of Genkai's shrine grounds. They rigged all of her arcade games to be played for free. There wasn't any sake – Kuwabara's doctor told him flat out, "No", he wasn't allowed to have any alcoholic beverages – so everybody drunk sparkling juices instead (though Yusuke swore up and down that his juice was spiked.) There were presents stacked as high as the man to whom they were given. There were so many people it was hard to find a seat. It was one of the best birthdays he ever had, Kuwabara said.

Three weeks later he passed away in his sleep.

The funeral was a quiet affair. Everyone who was at the birthday was there, not in black suits and dresses (he said he wanted everyone in bright colors, it's not like it's goodbye forever, after all), everyone speaking about their memories of him. Yusuke could barely get the words out, that he was a good friend, that he was… he couldn't get much out after that save for a long, pained howl: "_Kuwabaraaaa!_" Hiei, strangely enough, was more eloquent with his thoughts on Kuwabara.

_"He was a loud-mouthed idiot… But he was loyal and honest and lived by a code that any man should be proud to live by. He was a man you could count on and a good friend and ally. Kuwabara Kazuma, I am proud to say that I have known you."_

---

Yukina brushed the leaves that had fallen onto the grave stone off and pulled away clumps of fragrant grasses and weeds that had sprawled over the sides. Leaning down she kissed his name, doing her best to hold her tears at bay. It was hard, of course, she missed him so much. However, that was not the most difficult thing.

Yukina rubbed a white fist in her eye, ignoring the murmurs in the background of other people passing by to pay their respects to those lost to them. She sniffed again, and quietly read the epitaph.

Kuwabara Kazuma

Beloved friend, brother and ally

Loyal to the end

You will live on in our hearts

A tear rolled her cheek in remembrance of something she hadn't realized until after his passing: in all their time of knowing each other, not once had she ever said to him "I love you." Another tear fell - yet another to be added to the mantle. _Oh, Kuwabara!_ There should have been the word _husband_ on there.

* * *

Notes: Hah! I'm back! … I honestly didn't expect to write a new YYH fic. Ha, now let's see… how to explain some of the more… interesting aspects of this ficlet… Meaning that, yes, there will be some spoilers (identified by a "•".) 

•Yes, Kuwabara does end up with quite a few female admirers at the end of series. To see episode guide, delete the spaces: http:www. tvtome. com/ YuYuHakusho/ season4. html I was accurate about _that_, at least!

•Yusuke is apparently part demon, which probably explains why he is so talented physically. He just so happened to luck out and get the best of both worlds, which amplified each other (though it did nothing for his intelligence – he's only average, not stupid, average… and a bit naïve… he has a hard time developing emotionally and mentally as a person. That said, I suspect he will have a longer than average life span, as suggested by the unusually long cycle that his body goes through that, should he not have been revived when he did, he would have had to wait fifty years. O.o; Most of the demons that they meet seem to have very long life spans so his life span being increased wouldn't be so unusual. Kuwabara, Genkai, and Keiko, however, are full humans and thus their life spans would be shorter than his… He'd probably eventually go back to the Reikai or the Makai once he's by himself (or hang out with and bother Hiei and Kurama…)

I bet some people wanted to see a bit of a romance between Kurama and Hiei. Well, fat chance of my writing that! Frankly, there are too many KurHieiKur romances written and it is also one of the most unlikely romances, such as the supposed romance between Hiei and Mukuro. I don't care if Kurama looks like a girl; he doesn't get enough of a reaction out of Hiei to merit any ideas of romance. The reaction that Kurama garners from Hiei is far less than the one Kuwabara (whom Hiei…dislikes passionately) and much less than Yusuke (whom Hiei respects begrudgingly) provoke out of the little fire demon. Kurama and Hiei (and Mukuro) might be friends but none of them have proved to me to be strong enough emotionally to handle a romantic relationship.

Emotionally, the three demons (Kurama, Hiei, Mukuro) are… reserved, at best. A sense of humor and pity (and on that chain also lies sympathy and empathy) is something that even the least emotional of people can have.

- Kurama seems only emotional when it comes to his affections for his human mother and belated partner Kuronoe; he's too cold and reserved to put the moves on anyone and is still waiting for the day when he can shed his human persona and remain as Yuoko.

- Mukuro's emotions probably have been killed years and years ago in order for her to survive against the horrible situation she had been born into – that in itself is respectable (though I still don't like her since she stole Hiei, grr.)

- Hiei seems to be the most emotional out of the three said demons. He gets embarrassed and startled rather easily. He cares about his sister (and shows his care for her much the same way I often do – cares but doesn't particularly like to let the fact known until someone makes a move to hurt her… then I'll pound them into a fine dust.) He even likes Yusuke (as a friend!) though he tries not to show that he worries about the lucky idiot.

As for the romance between Yusuke and Keiko, here's a piece that I cut from the story:

_Their friends were always around when they needed them. Kurama was still a stick in the mud. Yusuke was still a happy-go-lucky airhead (when she did see him, that is – he would keep on disappearing for months at a time). Keiko and her husband (eventually Keiko and Yusuke parted ways… he just couldn't leave behind his responsibilities in the Makai, after all) were doting and caring, along with their two daughters (who had a penchant for pulling "Uncle Yusuke's" hair whenever he came around for a visit)…_

As sweet as the "romance" is between Yusuke and Keiko, I don't think she's the kind of girl who really would wait forever for him. While she seems very strong emotionally, after a while of putting up with his long disappearances she probably would get fed up and drained from all the worry he would put her through and realize that for her to truly live she needs to move on. I don't think Yusuke could end up with anyone who can't move around with the same freedom he does and therefore I don't see much romance in his future.


End file.
